Knitting Therapy

So, the paper of hell is coming along quite nicely. By nicely I mean, there are many pages. Few pages I like, really, but beggars can't be choosers.

I have a longing to write. Something other than Eliade, Smith, and the axis mundi - or General Gordon and the Mahdi. Or even nonfiction in general. I need to write fiction, or I might explode with creativity (which is clearly what the webpage was, until I completed the beauty part, and am now onto the mundane recoding of fic part). Perhaps I will write Harry Potter and the Venture of Islam, one of these days. It may resemble uzbad's Sparrow Prince fic, though would likely be over two paragraphs... and would definitely feature Snape and Farouk- I mean, 'Uthman - getting into a shouting match. And 'Uthman would call Snape's name stupid, because 'what kind of a name is Severus?'. If only you non-UC people knew the joy of 'Uthman. Or, fake 'Uthman's voice, and all of the mocking that has ensued since one fateful trip to the bowling alley.

I will miss these kids over this summer. I will continue to miss grinnellians over the summer, and next year, and after. I think I've come to realize, however, that as much as I miss them, there's no going back, no reclaiming what was. I feel like I'm moving away from the person I had become and transforming into something else entirely, and even I'm not sure what that is, or if I'll like it. I think I'm afraid of running into piratej or bessiemaemucho or johnnytexas on the street somewhere and not being able to strike a conversation anymore, at least not a conversation with meaning. I know that we all grow up and change and move apart, but I thought it was the college kids you always stayed friends with.

I miss the boatcouches and fic in the nook and West Wing being a good show that we all sat down to watch together, and going to the Phoenix and watching Pride and Prejudice and everyone commenting on the dark and brooding scenes. I miss eating in the dining hall, even if it was gross, because we all ate together and it was an event and you never knew what would come out of sasha_davidovna or gbuugg's mouth. I miss bad children's move night, and I miss leiascully's David Duchovny poster staring at us, and mindmaven and the yak, and taking psychic_refugee to LARP with me. I miss talking to kitlee625 randomly in the middle of the loggia about Star Trek for hours in the middle of the night, and I miss debating Buffy with anyone who would listen, and the West Wing and politics and religion to those who wouldn't. I miss living in the same building as most of my friends, and only a block or two from the rest, because living in a building where you don't know anyone (and really don't care to) sucks and is sometimes kinda lonely. I miss talking about pirates and ninjas and always wondering what those crazy kids down the hall were up to, and I even miss how sometimes we blew up at each other because we spent too much time in an enclosed space and we just had to blow up, and then it was over and we were friends again. And maybe I'm idealizing it all now, when I'm a year removed and can't quite remember how desperate I was to be done with college, but It was truly one of those times to cherish - all of it, from the first days of H3 to the horrors of some of the years right until we cried and cried and couldn't stop as we all packed up our cars to leave.

"I'm drawing a dinosaur in a suit, goddamnit!" -uzbad

Title: Harry Potter and the Venture of Islam... Sort of.
Fandom: Harry Potter
Rating: PG

( In case you don't care... )

And, in other news, 13/20 pages of the Paper That Will Never END.